CATWOMAN
by Rose Tattoo
Summary: **UPDATE CH 2**Basically, AU B/V later chapters. yamcha=capsule corp executive / vegeta=saiay-jin prince / bulma=CATWOMAN / read and find out plot...PLEEEEASE!!!!!!!!!!!
1. 1 FISH

This is my newest fic, set right before the trip to Namek. Everything pretty much follows the series accept Krillin got killed fighting the Saiya- jins instead of Yamcha. Yamcha is the son of Dr. Briefs and is an executive at Capsule Corp instead of a baseball player and Bulma is a secretary. Oh yeah.somewhere along the line Bulma goes insane and becomes CATWOMAN (dun dun dun) anywhay, you'll have to read the rest to find out what happens.  
  
DISCLAIMER: DON'T OWN DBZ OR THE CATWOMAN THEME BUT THE PLOT IS MINE  
  
Chapter 1 The Secretary's Requiem: Birth of Catwoman  
  
It was about 11:00 at night. Bulma unlocked the door to her tiny apartment on the west side of town. "Honey I'm home!" she shouted into the darkened living room, then mentally smacked herself on the head. "I forgot.I'm not married."  
  
Bulma brought a hand up to the wall beside her and fumbled around for the light switch. When she found it, the apartment was flooded with a soft yellowish light. She closed the door behind her and leaned against it, taking a few deep breaths. Today had not been the best of days. First, she was late to the office, arriving at nine thirty instead of eight and her boss laid out about five hundred things to do before his conference with all of Capsule Corp's major investors which was scheduled at eleven o'clock. Luckily Bulma managed to finish everything but then she had to make coffee for everyone attending the meeting and get her ass pinched by every man in the room, Yamcha included. She hated being treated like dirt but to everyone she was just a lowly secretary, completely controllable and at the disposal of anyone with a higher job position.  
  
Bulma had no choice but to live with all the shit thrown at her, she was overworked and groped at constantly by middle aged men wearing too much cologne. But she had to keep her job. There was nothing else in the city she could do. Sure she was pretty smart but she could never hope to get a high position at Capsule Corp. Every technician and inventor there, plus all the members of the board were male sexist pigs. She didn't even get paid the regular secretary wage because she was a pretty young girl with a loud mouth and sometimes violent tendencies.  
  
Bulma sighed and pushed herself away from the door and half walked, half staggered past the living room and into the kitchen, throwing her purse on a lamp stand as she went. Suddenly something furry brushed against Bulma's legs, making her jump at least five feet in the air. But she quickly regained her composure when she saw what it was.  
  
"Kami! Don't scare me like that Isis!" from her perch at Bulma's feet, Isis the cat looked up at her owner with a look of mild curiosity and annoyance. If her facial expression could be transferred into words, she would say: what took you so long getting home.I haven't eaten anything since this morning!  
  
Bulma bent down and picked up the cat. It was a black cat, not as small as the cat her father had, but lean and sharp clawed. The perfect backyard predator. Bulma smiled and scratched the cat behind the ears earning a purr and a shoulder nuzzle.  
  
Carefully stepping over Isis' food bowl, Bulma opened the refrigerator door and pulled out a carton of milk. She set Isis down and poured a little milk into her bowl, careful not to spill a drop. She then put the milk back in the fridge and made her way back into the living room to watch the late night news.  
  
Bulma plopped down on the couch and retrieved the remote from the coffee table in front of her. Bulma pushed a button and her small TV clicked on. She tuned it to a news channel.  
  
"As you can see, it is still taking a lot of time and effort to clean up all the damage left from the climactic battle that took place only a few months ago." a reported droned on about the Saiya-jins who came to Earth and the battle between them and Earth's Special Forces. Bulma remembered her best friend Chichi telling her about it a few days before it happened. At first, Bulma was shocked to hear Yamcha would be fighting, she didn't expect the man who sat behind a large oak desk at Capsule Corp could defend the world. Just goes to show how people can lead double lives like that.  
  
Of course the battle had been brutal. Bulma watched it on TV. Almost everyone on Earth's side was killed accept for Chichi's husband Goku and her son Gohan, and Yamcha managed to stay alive somehow. Afterwards, she remembered him talking about going to some plant Namek to retrieve the Dragonballs there. Bulma had only heard of the dragonballs from Chichi, she had never really seen them, and she certainly didn't think about taking trips to other planets to get them. Bulma didn't think there was any other intelligent life out there until the Saiya-jins came. Everything was changing from routine and normal to a fast paced, alien sci-fi thriller movie scene. If she thought about it too long her head would start hurting.  
  
Suddenly a little red light off to the side caught Bulma's eye. She turned her head to see what it was and found she had a message waiting on the answering machine. Bulma reluctantly stood up and walked the strenuous three feet to the answering machine.  
  
"Bulma, this is yourself calling." Bulma mentally smacked herself in the head again and uttered a few choice words. "Yamcha has another meeting tomorrow and you have to go all the way back to the office and prep all the files for him.life sucks doesn't it?"  
  
Bulma nodded and hastily grabbed her purse and rushed back out the door. Yes life did suck, but she had to keep her job.  
  
* * *  
  
Half an hour later, Bulma was sitting at Yamcha's oak desk in his office skimming over files she'd managed to pry out of the locked file cabinet on the other side of the room. For information this important, Yamcha sure didn't take a lot of effort to keep it safe and hidden from prying eyes. There was information about using Capsule Corp to create military weapons that would be sold to people from outer space. Now that Earth was open to the universe might as well do business with everybody, Bulma guessed. She flipped through a few loose leaf pages before coming to a thin folder. She opened it and found a list of names and products. Bulma's eyes widened. There was enough weaponry being sold to who knows who these people were-a 'Lord Freeza' being the most prominent name on the list-to wipe out entire planets.  
  
"What is going on here?" she asked herself in dismay, still flipping through the folder, she didn't notice the shadow that appeared in the doorway.  
  
'"That's exactly what I'd like to know," a smooth male voice said from the door. Bulma looked up startled. A clean shaven man in a black business suit and tie walked towards Bulma, the two scars on his face were dead give- aways concerning his identity.  
  
"M-Mr. Yamcha.I.I didn't hear you come in," Bulma stammered, shutting the folder and quickly standing up, a scared look on her face. She didn't know how well her boss would take a secretary breaking into his protected files. Yamcha on the other hand, knew exactly how he would deal with this "little situation".  
  
"Well that's because you weren't meant to Bulma," he took a few steps closer, causing Bulma to immediately take a few steps back, closer to the large picture window serving as a wall. Yamcha smirked inwardly. "Tell me Bulma.how exactly did you get these files? I was sure I put them in that cabinet with the advanced computer lock on it." his voice trailed off and Bulma became more nervous, and she had good reason to be.  
  
"W-well I just figured that the password was your girlfriend Marron's name and it was.er.I know how much this meeting tomorrow is important to the company and I though you'd want ot have everything all ready for um everything." Bulma glanced up at her boss who somehow got closer without her noticing.  
  
"Uh hu." was his only reply. Bulma gulped and chewed on her bottom lip. An awkward silence filled the room.  
  
"Um.this is all very interesting stuff, although a little advanced for me.trading with interplanetary buyers, selling them capsules and military products that could um.cause a lot of damage and in return get total control of the planet's business." Bulma's voice faltered a little as she saw a frown appear on Yamcha's face. "Wh-which is a good way to get all the way to the top I'd say."  
  
"Uh hu." Yamcha repeated, stepping closer to the meddling secretary. "And who exactly would you say all this to?" there was a slight growl in his voice that made Bulma tense up.  
  
"Well.nobody," she replied, backing away so far that her back was pressed against the window. Yamcha glared long and hard at her before his expression softened and a smile played across his face.  
  
"You're a very good secretary you know that?" Bulma smiled back and laughed nervously. She had an unnerving feeling where this was going.  
  
"Too good?" she asked looking him right in the eye, where she saw cold amusement. She shrank down a bit as Yamcha reached out and placed a hand on either side of her and leaned in a bit.  
  
"You know, everything in this company is depending on this deal with these intergalactic.friends of ours.we can't have any brilliant secretaries screwing anything up now can we?" he tilted his head down and whispered in her ear: "Well can we?"  
  
Bulma was starting to get really scared now. She had no idea how thin the ice she was walking on was until Yamcha whispered those words to her. She was nothing compared to him. He could snap her neck easily without any effort. Why did the world have to throw her into these situations?  
  
"Listen Yamcha," Bulma began, the fear evident in her voice. "I promise I won't tell anyone anything. It'll be our secret I swear.why do you have to be so mean to someone so meaningless I-" she stopped suddenly as Yamcha moved his head over so his face was mere centimeters from hers, their lips almost touching. They stayed that way for a few seconds before Yamcha pulled back, a good natured grin on his face. He suddenly began to laugh like the whole thing had been a big joke.  
  
Thinking everything was normal again, Bulma started laughing too. Her body relaxed against the glass and moved her hand to fan her face. "You know for a second there you really scared me."  
  
"Is that so?" he asked. Then without warning he lunged forward and pushed Bulma threw the window, letting her fall ten stories to the ground. Bulma screamed as she fell fast, hitting the ground in what seemed like seconds, she lay there on the concrete sidewalk, not moving or breathing.  
  
From ten stories above the crumpled body of his secretary, Yamcha turned from the window and started clearing up all the papers that were spread out on his desk. "Nosy little bitch.that'll teach her not to go trough protected files ever again," he laughed evilly to himself as he exited his office with the papers arranged in a stack under his left arm. Without taking a second glance at the broken window, he flipped the lights off and closed his office door.  
  
I know evil cliffie, evil yamcha but youll get the next chapter if you review ^-^ Next time bulma becomes catwoman and a trip to namek is launched veggi's not in the picture yet but he'll come along later. Not exactly sure how this'll become a romance but I'm working on it!  
  
Ja ne for now!  
  
; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Oh yeah, if any of you saw the batman returns movie you'll notice some of the stuff is similar to what happened in the first part of the movie when selena becomes catwoman. That's all their stuff, I just worked on the idea of it a little I don't take credit for it, my fic won't be the same as the movie (this is just a note so I don't get sued by anyone) 


	2. 2 FISH

Hey! Ch 2's up! Hope I didn't keep anybody waiting long. The reason I haven't updated in a long time is something happened with my computer and I lost all my fic files and I've spent this time repairing the damage but fear not all is well again and I should be updating all my stuff real soon.  
  
Also I'm making a really quick change here, only Tien and Chautzu (not spelled right I know, live with it) and Piccolo were killed. Krillin IS still alive.  
  
Now for some notes: everybody still has super powers (flying around shooting ki blasts etc.) and Bulma doesn't really know Goku or any of the other Z fighters accept Yamcha. She's just heard about them through Chichi who's her best friend. In this chapter Bulma goes crazy and actually becomes Catwoman. I know the title of ch 1 says birth of Catwoman but we all make typos and it was about 2 in the morning when I started writing so I wasn't really checking the grammar and stuff. Also fyi Isis is the real name of Catwoman's cat in the cartoon so just to let you know. Ok enough of my rambling.on with the fic!  
  
(right after the disclaimer) disclaimer: do not own dbz or catwoman concept, plot is mine  
  
Chapter 2 Birth of Catwoman part 2: sneaking into space  
  
On the ground, Bulma hadn't moved in a good twenty minutes. Her mind was in a state of shut down, not knowing whether she was alive or dead, or anything else for that matter. Her mind didn't even register the soft brush of fur against her cheek.  
  
Amid the bits and pieces of broken glass, a black cat walked carefully around the woman. This cat was soon joined by nine others. At first they just paced back and forth around her body, keeping their distance, not sure themselves if the woman was still breathing. But soon they became more daring. A calico boldly stepped up and perched on Bulma's stomach, peering down at her pale face. Seeing the woman did nothing, all the other cats converged in on her. Roaming over her body, scratching at her arms and legs, gnawing on her fingers and bumping into her head as they went past.  
  
Slowly, ever so slowly, Bulma began to register pain. Gradually, the pain grew until it felt like her body was going through a shredder. Bulma couldn't stand it any more. Summoning up all her strength, she opened her eyes and lurched her body upward.  
  
All the cats froze immediately. As if they were kids and their mom caught them with their hands in the cookie jar. Without even acknowledging the cats, Bulma pulled herself to her feet and walked slowly to her car (which was parked a few feet away) in a trancelike state.  
  
Bulma drove home without registering anything. She knew she had been at the office and since she "woke up" to find herself outside, it was only natural to go back to her apartment. She glanced down at the steering wheel and noticed her hands were all bloody. Hmmm.I wonder how that happened, she asked herself without much curiosity.  
  
At home, Bulma slowly put the key in the lock and opened the door. Light flooded out into the hall as Bulma stepped into the apartment and shut the door behind her.  
  
"Honey I'm home.oh I forgot I'm not married." her voice was soft on the air, a monotone, not holding any emotion. She walked to the lamp stand and set her purse down, knocking over the lamp as she did so. It crashed to the floor, the light bulb shattering.  
  
Bulma slowly passed the living room, running her hand over the back of the couch as she made her way to the kitchen. Isis was sitting in front of the fridge, her black tail flitting nervously behind her. Bulma stared blankly at the cat for a few minutes before reaching out and pulling the refrigerator door open. She grabbed the carton of milk and bent down, pouring milk into the cat bowl, letting it over flow, creating a white puddle on the floor. Bulma then walked back into the living room, the carton still in hand. She looked at it for a while, then took a long drink, milk dribbling down her chin and the light blue secretary/business dress she wore.  
  
Bulma plopped down on the couch and grabbed the remote. She turned on the TV and stared blankly at the news. On the screen, a bulldozer and other construction equipment were busy clearing away the wreckage of South City. A reporter drowned on about damage costs. Finding the news boring, Bulma turned her head to the answering machine. The little red light was blinking.  
  
Lazily, Bulma got up and dragged herself to the machine, her eyes slightly glazed over, her mind only half registering her surroundings. Bulma reached out a hand and pushed a button.  
  
"Hey Bulma it's Creg from the CC. Listen, Yamcha wanted me to prep things for the meeting tomorrow so you don't have to worry about it ok."  
  
Something suddenly snapped in Bulma's mind as Creg's voice drawled out of the little black machine. Everything became a vivid shade of red as her senses came crashing back to her. Rage boiled up inside her and her hands clenched into fists. She let out a piercing scream and violently grabbed the answering machine, slamming it down on the table a few times before hurling it behind her and out a window.  
  
Bulma tore through the apartment like a mad hurricane. After she killed the answering machine she ran into the kitchen, grabbed a frying pan out of the sink and swung it into the microwave, creating a rather large dent. Seeing there really wasn't anything else to do in the kitchen she made her way into the bedroom, smashing pictures framed on the wall with the frying pan. Once she reached her closet, she stopped and dropped the frying pan and flung the closet doors open. She dropped to her knees and dug around on the closet floor. Five minutes later she stood up with a can of spray paint and a lighter. She giggled as she flipped the lighter on and held it in front of the spray paint can.  
  
Fire shot out of the can as Bulma pressed the button on the top. The clothes in the closet went up in flames as Bulma grinned mischievously. The closet looked like a gateway to the fiery pits of Hell. This image made Bulma laugh harder. Then, of course, she remembered that the spray paint can/flame thrower could backfire on her, so she casually dropped the lighter and chucked the can into the hall. Turning back to her closet, she saw something black and shiny standing out amid the dimming orange flames and the ashes of her clothes. She picked the black shiny thing up to discover it was a big rain coat. She vaguely remembered buying it last year at some department store.  
  
Suddenly an idea popped into her head. Bulma's smile turned into a devilish smirk as she tucked the coat under one arm and picking up her sewing case (which also escaped the fire in the closet).  
  
Throwing everything on her bed, she ran to the other side of the room to retrieve her sewing machine.  
  
Three hours later Bulma stepped out of her apartment covered from head to toe in skintight form fitting black shiny material with complimentary black evening gown gloves and knee high, black, high heel boots. The top of her face was covered by a mask (also made out of the same shiny black material), which also covered the back of her head and hair. Cat ears were fashioned on the top of her head.  
  
The night was still young and the city was asleep, the perfect hunting ground and it was all hers for the taking. Bulma licked her lips in anticipation as she started out the door but the soft brush of fur against her leg stopped her. Bulma looped down and smacked herself in the head with her hand.  
  
"Oh Isis I'm sorry! How could I have forgotten you?!" Bulma bent down and scooped up the black cat who glared at her with narrowed yellow eyes.  
  
"I said I was sorry," she said incredulously and started scratching the cat behind the ears. It started to purr but didn't take off the glare. Bulma sighed. Isis was never one to release a grudge so quickly. "Ok.how about we stop at the sushi bar on the way back huh?"  
  
With that the cat immediately perked up and gave Bulma a small love bite on the arm. Bulma smiled. "I knew you couldn't stay mad at me forever," Bulma cooed at the cat before slinging it up across her shoulder and taking off at a swift run into the night.  
  
* * *  
  
the next morning, Satan City Hospital  
  
Yamcha yawned lazily and crumpled the empty paper coffee cup in his hand before throwing it over his shoulder and into the garbage can ten feet away.  
  
"Nice one Yamcha," Yamcha looked up and smiled as Krillin and his girlfriend (Yamcha's girlfriend) Marron walked in.  
  
"Hey Krillin, Marron," he smiled at the blue haired girl. She reminded him of that secretary.what was her name.Buruma.no.Bulma.yeah that was it, the one he pushed out the window. It was a real pity though; she was a real looker. Yamcha always hated to see a pretty face go to waste, but it had to happen. She knew too much.  
  
"Heard anything new about Goku yet?" Krillin asked, pulling up a chair and sitting beside his friend. Yamcha shook his head. Marron sat on the couch across from the boys, her legs crossed and her already too short dress slid up her thigh to reveal more of her tanning booth product skin. But she was disappointed to find Yamcha and Krillin weren't talking to her so she just shrugged and picked up an out of date magazine that somehow managed to distract her from the fact she was being ignored.  
  
"Nope, nothing new, the doctors won't let him receive visitors yet but Chichi said she would show up today and since I have the day off I thought I'd come down and keep her company."  
  
Krillin smiled and tilted his head back. "I pity the doctors when she gets here. She won't give them a moments peace," he chuckled. Krillin still couldn't believe it had only been two months since their battle with the Saiya-jins.  
  
Just then two nurses walked by huddled together as if in fear. Both Krillin and Yamcha stared at them. What had them so worked up?  
  
"Yes.and did you hear? She supposedly stole top secret documents right out of the Capsule Corp president's office.and then robbed a sushi bar!" one nurse said in a whiny high pitched voice. At the mention of his beloved company, Yamcha jumped to his feet and ran over to the two nurses with Krillin in tow.  
  
"I heard she killed ten police officers and set of a bomb that destroyed an entire block!" the other nurse replied, her face becoming paler by the minute. Suddenly large hands clamped down on her shoulders and spun her around to face a very angry and agitated Yamcha. The nurse's eyes widened in fear.  
  
"Who stole top secret documents? TELL ME NOW!" Yamcha shook the nurse by her shoulders a few times and glared at her. The nurse only sobbed and fell to the floor when Yamcha let her go. Her companion knelt down beside her and put a protective arm around the crying nurse and glared up at him.  
  
"You brute!" the other nurse scolded in her annoyingly high pitched voice that made Yamcha wince. "Can't you see the current events have upset her? Her brother was in the sushi bar when it happened-"  
  
"When WHAT happened?" Yamcha demanded, his hands balling into fists at his sides and his ki rising slightly.  
  
"Woah! Calm down man!" Krillin yelled as he felt Yamcha's ki skyrocket.  
  
"You mean you don't know?" the nurse asked in disbelief. Her question only made Yamcha even angrier. The nurse could have sword steam was coming out of his ears.  
  
"Don't know what?" Krillin asked, stepping in between Yamcha and the nurse. He too was curious about what they were talking about.  
  
"Last night some woman went crazy!" the crying nurse wailed. "She broke into Capsule Corp and stole some secret document thingy then robbed a few jewelry stores and banks but then after that she steals all the sushi from Tahi's Sushi Bar and blows up the entire block." the nurse paused to catch her breath, then she looked right into Krillin's eyes. "The cops said she calls herself.(dramatic pause for effect ^-^).Catwoman."  
  
Catwoman? Yamcha thought, his eyes wide with disbelief. No one had ever heard of a crime being committed in Satan City in almost ten years, why did it start up again now? But that wasn't the main problem here. "Important documents" were stolen from his office, and he had a pretty good feeling what documents were gone. Luckily Yamcha had taken most of the Top Secret papers home with him after he disposed of that meddling secretary but the contracts stating the business transactions were still in the filing cabinet and he didn't relock it when he left. Without those contracts trade could not commence, and if there were any setbacks there would be a lot of angry space tyrants breathing down his neck. Something Yamcha didn't want or need.  
  
But who could have known the location of those doc-  
  
NO.no it couldn't have been her. She was dead, lying in front of the building with every bone in her body broken from the fall. But the nurses didn't say anything about finding a body on the sidewalk.no.it wasn't her. She was dead.no one could have survived that fall.  
  
"Yamcha.HEY Yamcha!" Yamcha was pulled back to reality as he heard Krillin calling him. He turned his head and looked down at the shorter man.  
  
"What?" he asked simply. Then he noticed the nurses were gone. He and Krillin were standing alone in the hallway.  
  
"What are you gonna do? I mean stuff was stolen from your office, shouldn't you call the police or do something?"  
  
"The police probably already know stuff was stolen Krillin," Yamcha said slightly annoyed. "But as for what I'm going to do.I think it's time we took that trip to Namek. We need to wish our friends back as soon as possible.if the thief isn't caught by the time we get back I'll take care of her myself," Yamcha smirked and started back to his seat at the opposite end of the room. He would have to tell Goku he'd be leaving soon.maybe even Gohan would like to come with them. That kid really needed some exposure, and a few weeks away from his harpy of a mother.  
  
"Oh okay Yamcha," Krillin said following him, then he stopped dead in his tracks. "What do you mean we?"  
  
"What? You didn't think I was going into outer space alone did you?"  
  
"Well no but-"  
  
"No buts Krillin. You're coming with me no questions asked." I'll need some extra muscle in case I run into any of my "clients" out there.  
  
* * *  
  
One week later  
  
Yamcha stared at the controls on the central panel on the bridge of the latest capsule shuttle. It was shaped like one of the Saiya-jin space pods and had three levels: a storage area, living quarters, and training area. In the living space there were three rooms with a bed and bath, along with a kitchen and recreation room with a complete sound system, DVD player and a game cube.  
  
Accompanying Yamcha on his "Quest for the Dragonballs" was Krillin, one of his best friends, and Gohan, the son of Goku, the human Saiya-jin. After some persuasion and a lot of groveling on Gohan's part, his mother Chichi allowed him to go on the trip to outer space.  
  
But there was one more person accompanying the trio on this little joyride: Bulma a.k.a. Catwoman. She had been hanging around Capsule Corp (mostly at night in cat skin) and had caught wind of Yamcha's plans. Bulma had never been to outer space before. Why not take a vacation? Besides, she was supposedly dead to everyone at the CC, no work to put a damper on a little trip.  
  
So it came to pass, the night before take off, Bulma broke into the launch station where the gigantic space pod was waiting to leap into the skies. She easily cracked open the door to the cargo hold and settled herself in one of the boxes packed full of explosives. She really had to give Yamcha credit, he never went into anything unprepared.  
  
From her place in the cardboard box, Bulma glanced at her watch. Five minutes till take off. Bulma sighed with relief, already she was getting tired of sitting in this cramped box. Unfortunately there was no better hiding place.  
  
She already had everything planned out, she would stay in the box at night, then when everyone was asleep she would go out and get food, maybe snatch some stuff from the boys every now and then when they weren't looking.  
  
The trip would be long and uncomfortable but once she got to Namek she'd be as free as a bird.well, cat. But she did have a hidden agenda. Bulma wanted revenge on Yamcha, and Yamcha wanted the Dragonballs, whatever they were. And Bulma would do whatever she could to keep him from reaching his goal.  
  
Suddenly a sharp jolt shook the ship. "Time to leave," Bulma said gleefully to herself. Bulma stretched out her arms to brace herself for takeoff.  
  
The ship rumbled and lurched, but shot up off the ground with incredible speed. It felt like her stomach was being wrenched from her body. Maybe I shouldn't have eaten all that sushi last night.she thought to herself as she fought to keep her meal down.  
  
Yep.it would be a long flight. Maybe once they got out of the atmosphere it would be better. Bulma hoped so.  
  
Okay end of chapter 2. so did you like it? Hate it? Review and tell me. Also, I need to know if I should zap them straight to Namek or should I include that little invisible ship part and the fake planet namek. Let me know. I NEED INPUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 


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